This months article is not to be confused with the 1984 Wendy’s slogan, “Where’s the Beef?” Some of you may remember it, of course it was the year I graduated high school. Uh, er, well… that cat’s out of the bag, but I digress. Instead, I’m reminded more of the urban slang, which is short for “Do you got beef with me?”
In other words, do you have a problem with me, or have I done something to offend you? It seems these days more and more people are offended by the littlest of things. You know, like when your in the fast lane doing 75 MPH in downtown Austin in a 60 MPH speed zone, and someone flies passed you with his hand out the window declaring for all to see that you are #1 in his book; only to realize that’s not the universal symbol for #1, but he is actually very upset because you didn’t move over to the slow lane.
There are hundreds, maybe thousands or possibly millions of examples ranging from the petty and insignificant, like someone in the drive through placing a large order for all the imaginary passengers (so you think) and keeps changing the order, to the malicious and intentional, of which my favorite is driving around a parking lot to find a spot then just when you discover one and commit to reserve it for yourself, someone from the other lane does a pull through on you.
Click image to hear audio sermon on this topic.
As a teenager, I carried a full assortment of anger, hatred and “you got beef” issues where I was always looking for a good argument exercising my superior intellect to degrade another just for sport. Victory achieved when I left them absolutely dumbfounded they were even insulted. When I found Christ, He delivered me from all my hate, bitterness and unforgiveness. I would say of myself, and believe so would others, that today I am very mild and even-tempered. There’s not much that gets under my skin or pushes my mean button.
I heard someone tell me one time that if you asked yourself, in any potentially tense situation, “is this a piano” you’ll find out it won’t have mastery over you and you’ll navigate calmly through just about anything. You see it is a pain staking process to tune a piano to finite precision. The level of patience, energy, time and overall investment can be exhausting. If what ever we are facing doesn’t require that level of emotional, physical or spiritual investment, then it’s just not worth getting worked up about.
Why did I say all of this? I’m glad you asked… I make a point to live my life with the same character all the time, everywhere and with the same level of passion. In my latter adult years, being in leadership, I’ve matured in statesmanship, diplomacy and timing. I work hard to walk according to Micah 6:8, do justly, love kindly and walk humbly with my Lord (paraphrased). What I’ve discovered with many people I engage is they do not like this about me. It seems like I’m constantly checking myself to see what I did wrong, only to discover most times it’s not that I did something or have “beef” with someone, but they have an issue with me and I don’t even know what I did.
Maybe you’ve found yourself in a similar boat. Either someone, for some reason has “beef” with you or you with them. In our culture, we seem to be so stubborn and unmovable to the point this most likely petty offence has metamorphosed into full out bitterness. It’s crazy how we would rather stew in our pride, division and isolation than swallow the hot burning lump of ugliness in our throat and take the first step to reconciliation. That is the ministry Christ gave us through His grace, according to 2 Corinthians 5:18. Sadly, we miss out on so many opportunities for fellowship, mutual support and partnership in mission.
As I close, I’m reminded of these scriptures: Where there’s bitterness, the grace of Christ is absent and we are defiled, according to Hebrews 12:15. Ephesians 4:26 warns us not to let the sun set while we are still angry. Matthew 5:21-26 encourages us to go make things right with our brother and forgive him before we bring our offerings to the altar. Matthew 6:14-15 and Luke 6:37-42 firmly tell us when we forgive others; our Father in Heaven forgives us. John 20:23 states if we withhold forgiveness, it is withheld from us. Finally, James 5:16 tells us to confess our sins and pray for one another that we may be healed. (All references paraphrased)
We can’t control what or how others should respond on this topic. We are only in control of what and how we respond. The next time “You Got Beef” with another human being, don’t let the situation fester, don’t let time get away from you or “let the sun set on your anger”, don’t wait for the other person to make the first move, and most importantly don’t make the situation worse. Instead…go make it right and do right now! Your forgiveness, healing and Christ grace in your life is at stake.
James Miller Jr
“Missionary to a Generation”
*Published in the July 31st, 2014 issue of the Port Aransas South Jetty newspaper.
via “You Got Beef?” – Grace Church of Port Aransas.
